Polynesian Culture Center’s Haunted Lagoon is a beautiful nightmare

Disclosure: The Polynesian Culture Center comped me 5 tickets to attend the “Sneak Preview VIP Night” of the Haunted Lagoon.

Last year my family and I attended the sneak preview night of the Haunted Lagoon and at the end, Jayden Boy exclaimed, “I knew I should have stayed home with Tutu!”  Nalani, better known as the “Laie Lady” has been dwelling in Jay’s mind for nearly a year.  He’s rushed through late night showers because the legend warns everyone to “stay away from the water.”  If there’s a light switch in his path, he’ll turn it on, even if he’s only walking 10-steps.

So, when I received our invitations to attend this year, he grabbed my phone and called his Tutu.  They spent their evening dining over their take-out orders from Zippy’s talking story about anything but women in white dresses or bodies of water, while the rest of us headed over the H-3.

When we arrived, we were greeted by a line that was quickly snaking towards the entrance. I heard that last year the lines were long as well, fortunately PCC sets up beverage stands and if you’re considering not attending because of this reason — you’ll be missing out on one of the best performances in Hawaii.  It’s totally worth the wait!

On our canoe of screamers were Tony Silva of the duo, Da Braddahs with his brood of young men, Civil Beat’s Dan Zelikman with his pretty lady, and a nervous young man a few rows back who kept talking about Sugar Babies candy before we pushed out.  I sat in the first seat to the left in the fourth row followed by my nephew Keoki Han, his sister Alisa, Chelsea, and Lilinoe.  The anticipation was building and after brief instructions of, “keep your body in the boat, don’t touch the monsters or they may touch you back, and no cameras” we pushed off into darkness.

Like last year, I won’t give out any details except to say that it’s horrifically awesome and different from last year.  Things, creatures, zombies, freaky characters, and the Laie Lady emerge from the waters of the lagoon to scare the living daylights out of its curious guests for a little less than thirty-minutes.  I counted that Lilinoe jumped from her seat into Chelsea’s lap at least three times and once into Alissa’s!  Keoki squeezed my hand so hard that it’s making it difficult for me to type this out.

In case you’re not toO familiar with the Laie Lady, you can read her diary or follow her on Twitter @laielady.  The Haunted Lagoon officially opens to the public on Friday, October 1, 2010.  Read more about the complete schedule and discounts here.